Baby It’s Cold Outside

     I have always been fascinated with the way stores think they can sell clothing. I think this is the reason I hang out at Savers, The Youth Ranch, and Deseret. The things I will not buy used are shoes, socks, underwear, or thermal underwear. That is a good way to get some type of bacterial infection.

     Stores make it difficult to shop for anything. I mean anything. If you want light bulbs, you have to go from store to store or replace whatever it is that needs that particular light bulb. I need to do that anyway because the fixture keeps shorting out; thanks for reminding me, Mr. Government. I really hate shopping because nothing is available when you need it.

     Take my birthday for example. I despise it when people want to take me out shopping. I understand that one does not know what to get me. If you throw a party for me, I am pretty happy for that. Make me something; I don’t care. Nobody knows what I am looking for and do not know what I already have. On that note, I am currently collecting Dylan McDermott…I also like vodka, martinis, Bloody Mary, margaritas, gyros, and sushi.

     Anyway, sometimes my father takes me clothes shopping. My birthday is the end of July and this is when they are selling clothes for fall when it is still freakishly hot outside. I don’t have very many clothes to keep me cool and comfortable. If I am shopping in July, I don’t want to be buying a sweater.

     I find it equally aggravating to go shopping for warm clothes during the winter. This is challenging when you are just starting out and do not have very much money. During the winter, you should be able to buy coats, thermal underwear, and snow boots. But, noooooo, you have to buy a bikini and transparent clothing when the roads are clearly covered in ice. You have to go to a million stores to find something to prevent getting frost bite.

     What is with transparent clothing anyway? I don’t like buying different clothes to go underneath something. It is unnecessary and wasteful of money. Some of them are pretty, but no.

     I would like to for once just go to a store and get what I need. When I buy something during the winter, I do not want something that is see through. When I buy something during the summer, I am not trying to bundle up in something warm.  


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